Saturday, March 17, 2007

You Can Hammer My Nail

Sunny, barely a cloud in the sky, with a nice cool breeze… the perfect spring day!

Honey, I got roasted today! I needed it though… I’m still all white and pasty from winter.

I had to help my dad rebuild our car shed. I would have tried to get out of it somehow, but being that my car (out of the five others) gets the privilege of parking under said car shed, I couldn’t easily weasel my way out. Besides, the rebuilt car shed increases the width of my spot by 6”… and these 6” are very welcomed! (Hehe! you know what I’m thinking!!) I’m not sure how I nailed that spot – my brother never got it – but I’ve had it since I’ve had a set of wheels. Charm? Luck? The favorite?!

That had me out at 10 this morning (had to catch up on my sleep first) all the way until about 5 this evening doing various things ranging from fetching tools to holding boards to pecking at nails with a hammer. Speaking of hammering, well, it’s just sad. I’m ambidextrous which totally blows my mind when I pick up a hammer. Which hand??? It doesn’t feel right in either of them!! I usually end up constantly swapping hands… but that’s neat… I’m just talented like that! Well, maybe not! The little bit of coordination I have vanishes when I hold a hammer. No matter what hand it's in I still can’t hit the damn nail! And all the while, my dad’s over there going crazy with a hammer… I’m still sitting there missing the nail over half the time. Eventually, he’ll feel sorry for his coordination-challenged son (or just get frustrated) and assign me a different, simpler task like figuring out what how much needs to be cut off a board or getting something level… I can handle that. I try though, I really do.

And hey, I finally got to put my hideous carpenter jeans to good use!! I hate those jeans – they make me look fat – but today I slid a hammer into the little loop my left pants leg. I felt so masculine!! Even though I couldn’t actually do much with the hammer, it still made me feel all tingly inside to have the handle banging against my leg as I walked (or was that something else?)! I think I may start to wear them more often… accessorized, of course, with some cute but manly hammer… ya know, in case I need it sometime! ;)

I’m just more of a wrench guy than a hammer guy though. Any idiot can use a wrench but only the skilled can use a hammer… and I don’t fall into that category.

6 comments:

Jack said...

It's the first time I hear a guy that can use both hands have a problem with both on a particular activity. ;)

My adventures said...

it took me years to master the use of a hammer and many many bruised fingers, i finally got it from playing golf, keep your eye on the nail!!! lol... good luck with that... or just get a master's degree and pay someone cute to do it for you!!! lol...

A Lewis said...

When can I hammer the nail?

Anonymous said...

So where's the pic of the D-Stud in his carpenter jeans with his hammer a-hangin'?

Sly, you can hammer on my shed any day. I know you're manly enough to do it well.

;)

Mike said...

What's this "hammer" thing that you speak of?

A Bear in the Woods said...

Carpenter's jeans are great for looking butch. Just watch out for the dreaded "Plumber Butt Syndrome".