My Morning

~12:05 AM: I climb into bed after washing my face and taking the transparent pieces of sandpaper many call contacts out of my eyes. As usual, I lie on my back for about 30 minutes as my mind reviews the day, contemplates the normal things, and wishes I had someone lying beside me in bed. Slowly and without noticing, those thoughts exit my mind and I drift off into a deep sleep.

6:45 AM: My cell phone alarm starts blaring. Half asleep, I almost fall out of bed clawing at my nightstand for the damn phone, wanting to throw it against the wall just to shut it up.

My fingers quickly find the button on the side of the phone that silences the alarm. I grab the phone and fall back into to my little hole in the bed, not wanting to get up. Thoughts of skipping my 9:00 class and sleeping late flood my mind.

“I never pay any attention in that class anyway,” I rationalize. “We’re not going over anything new, just the same-old, same-old.”

I flip open my phone, which I was still holding in my hand for some reason, and adjust the alarm. I toss the phone on the shelf over my bed as my eye lids begin their descent.

~8:00 AM: I awake to… something. I look at the clock and with a sigh my head meets my pillow again.

8:45 AM: My ears fill with that all too familiar noise emitting from my phone. Too out of it to realize the sound is coming from overhead, my hand shoots for the nightstand only to be redirected when my mind remembers the phone isn’t there.

I lie back on the bed for a few minutes staring up at the ceiling, knowing I have to get up now. I can’t miss my other class, even though it’s the one I dream of skipping despite the guy in my history being in there.

So, I crawl out of bed and go pee. While in the bathroom, I step on the scales. Wow! 146 – look at me! I’ve only lost weight in my arms and legs though – my belly hasn’t gone anywhere despite the low number for my height and build. Then, I do my customary admiring-my-ass-in-the-mirror routine. Hot stuff!

I go about the rest of my drawn-out morning slowly waking up and getting ready to face the world.

9:56 AM: Finally ready, I prance out to my car and embark on my 50 minute journey to class. I fight over whether to drive fast, get there quicker, get there way too early, and risk getting pulled over or take it easy, drive for a longer amount of time, get there just a little early, and not have to worry much about any flashing lights in my rearview mirror. I eventually decide to take it easy since there have been many cops – including state troopers – prowling the road I spend the most time on.

My radio thumping and my mouth running occasionally, the tedious drive passes fairly quickly… but not quickly enough.

10:49 AM: After almost getting side-swiped yet again, I make it to the campus parking lot and pull into a random spot. I’ve never been one to circle the lot for 20 minutes waiting for that perfect spot near the building. I have legs and they work. I can walk. I need the exercise.

What cracks me up are the people who do circle the parking lot looking for a close spot. Is it me or do they always seem to be fat people who need to be walking anyway? Park in the farthest spot out – you may lose a pound or two.

11:21 AM: I look down at my watch. I’m starting to worry. The class was supposed to start at 11:15, and the professor isn’t here yet. Don’t tell me I drove up here for nothing! He had better show up or I’m hunting his ass down.

To make matters worse, the guy in my history class is not here. No one to look at to occupy my time…

11:22 AM: THERE HE IS!! Thank you! Most students probably want the professor to skip, but I don’t. I drive too far to have the professor not show up.

For the next hour, I write two and a half pages of notes about European rulers who I don’t give a rat’s ass about at the moment. I have much bigger concerns occupying my thoughts. Those will have to be dealt with later though. For now, I just have to get the pain in my hand to stop.

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So, that was my morning. Not a typical morning – I rarely skip class to sleep in – but, nevertheless, it was my morning today.